As a cop, we learn to question everything. Most people go by the adage “trust but verify” but when you are a cop its more like distrust until there is proof to the contrary. When I walked into the academy the first day with all my fresh faced and greenhorn fellow brother and sister recruits, the C/O took the podium and stated “you have all walked in here on day one and everyone you see has good intentions until you can prove they have evil in their heart. When you walk out of here on the last day everyone you see is doing wrong or has an angle until you can prove otherwise. That my friends is true (at least in my case) You can ask Enforcerwife, I agrivate her all the time with it. I call it my mild case of paranoia, but just cause I’m paranoid doesn’t mean there not out to get me, right?

I’ll bet you are asking yourself “Enforcer, why the hell did you bring this up today? Whats the deal here?

Well, I was surfing the net for interesting cop stuff (re: screwing off at work again) and I came across the article below. The sub shop in question is in the general area, thankfully it’s too far away to grab a bite at when I’m at work……..

Lowell And Tewkesbury Massachusetts Police Officers Get Spit And Dick/Ass Touched Food From Santoro’s Sub Shop

An employee of “Santoro’s Sub Shop” reports that the whole time he worked there, he and other employees would spit in Lowell and Tewkesbury police officers food, put their penis’s in buns or rub them on their butts before loading them.

This guy must share some DNA with this girl feeding some of the same cops her boyfriend’s cum: Excuse Me Officer, Would You Like That With or Without Sperm? Lowell And Chelmsford Massachusetts Cops Unknowingly Get The Daily “Special”

He reports management knew what was going on, they thought it was funny, and only said “don’t get caught”, and that it is some what of a long-time tradition among Santoro’s employees.

“They’re open late, so the cops come in all the time. We all got to know who they were when they called in [an order], so we’d fix them up whenever we could. It was a ’special order’ joke for the cops there :)”

“…so now I work at another resturaunt and do the same thing, but have to keep it undercover cause the boss seems to kiss the cops asses.”

“…while I was there I must have spit a couple hundred times.”

Of course, Bad Cop News does not advocate putting foreign substances in cops food, but if you do, tell us about it after the fact! We’ve received quite a few stories in the past, haven’t bothered to post them, but now we will! Note date it happened so we can wait a month or two before it appears.

What pisses me off the most (other than the obvious) is the wink wink type of endorsement the writer of the article seems to give in his disclaimer. The site in question is set up by its authors as a forum to skewer (or as they say in their tag line)provide an virtual anal probe of the police.
Am I that far of base in my paranoia?
You decide but I think not



  1. Being a police officer is a very difficult job as you see the bad side of people all the time but these shites that spit into the food and support such things wouldn’t have any trouble calling the police for help if they needed it. Its the system that needs spit in its food not the cops.

  2. If the sub shop is burned to the ground, will any authority care?

    And remember, it’s only paranoid when nothing happens. When something does happen, its called being prepared.

    Jeane Assam was prepared.

  3. Knudsen- The system deffinately needs a kick in the ass

    Goddess- I’m thinking you are right

    Admiral- Thanks bro, we keep on keeping on

    Officer Wright- I personally wouldnt shed a tear but I dont condone such actions. And I like that phrase about being prepared. I will deffinately be using that one

    MCM- Yeah, I agree, not cool at all

    Witchy and Katey- I do pack a lunch….
    Now that I read that. We usually stick to 2-3 subshops and Chinese food resturaunts that we know the owners and workers when we do grab a bite out.

  4. Hahaha, I’ve been taking my food to work with me, just because of the potential for this type of nonsense, for a couple of years now………not to mention it’s healthier, apparently VERY MUCH Healthier!

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